Feb 3 starts the Chinese New Year – the Year of the Rabbit. I am sure my husband will want to celebrate; probably by going to any one of the three buffets that offer a plethora of Chinese cuisine in our little area. I admit it does not take much to get him to one. Like TG Sheppard and his women, when it comes to buffets, my husband loves ‘em, every one.
We often eat out on Saturdays, mostly at the buffets, and I will tell you, I do not order off the menu. Because, contrary to rules of thumb everywhere, I do actually eat less from a buffet. I take just a piece of each offering – one piece of Lemon Chicken, one mushroom from the beef and mushroom, one (OK, two) broccoli from the Chicken and Chinese Vegetables. I do take the sesame green beans but I bypass rice and lo mien and I do grab an egg roll. I stick pretty much to chicken offerings as well as create my own vegetable palate. With all this, I still have less on my plate than someone who does order off the menu. I try not to go back for seconds. Depends on if I am full or not. We do not eat dinner on these days, but I may have fruit later.
But, you know, it’s OK to once in a while, once in a great while, to have seconds. I am learning I cannot deprive myself but am also learning to eat only when I am hungry. My cousin has H.A.L.T. on her fridge. You have to ask yourself, she says, why are you eating? Hungry? Angry? Lonely? Tired? If you are hungry, eat, but if not, find something else to do.
I am finding this is more than a diet. I am finding it is a new way not only to live, but to think. I have to adhere to most rules but I have to be easy on myself when I don’t or when I can’t. (Because I also like the chicken chunks in the sweet and sour chicken!)
It’s something new every day, and I will pass it all along as I go on this journey.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Catch-22
Catch 22
There is a space on Facebook called “About Me”. Mine says only “22”. That number doesn’t symbolize my favorite age, nor is it the number of a favorite athlete.
Simply, it defines my goal. In Weight Watchers we talked about realistic goals. Saying we want to lose weight is fine, but for some of us, what we want to lose is beyond the scope of anything immediate. Or even short term. And can even be so overwhelming that it’s hard to stay focused on losing weight at all. Our leader suggested goals that were easy to obtain in the short term to help us build to the long term goal.
Some are focusing on the 10% and some on 5%. For me the number on the scale moving ever so slowly down is a painful reminder of how far is yet to come. And frankly, on someone my size, 10% is barely visible to the naked eye. It’s disheartening when you mention you’re on Weight Watchers and you’re asked if you’ve lost anything yet…after losing 32 pounds. Sigh. I haven’t yet, but did last time I went. Then I got frustrated and quit. I am not going to quit again.
The 22, therefore, does not represent the next weight loss goal. What it does represent is the next size down in my transitional wardrobe. I have many pieces of clothing in 22 and I am, alas, a 24. A large 24. That is not to say I am a 26. The 24s fit. Just fit. So, my goal, the 22, is the size I am shooting for. Loose clothing is something real I can feel and is concrete evidence that, while my husband or kids might not notice I am losing weight, I will know I am losing weight.
I am also trying to forgo ‘comfortable clothes’ in public. You who are bonus sized know what I am talking about: The sweatpants, pajama pants, ‘workout’ pants and stretch pants and the coordinating sweatshirts, oversized blouses and the poly-cotton shirts that stretch (whether we want them to or not).
These clothing choices really do nothing except scream that I am uncomfortable in my own skin so I am not dressing me up when I go out. And you know what? Why shouldn’t I look nice? I mean, I try to pull it together when I go to work, but why shouldn’t I slap on make-up, do my hair and just feel good with who I am when I am not at work?
So, that is why I am focusing on size 22. I can get there – it is one size, one goal, one step. Chinese Philosopher Lao Tzu said the journey of 1,000 miles begins with one step. Let the countdown of many one steps begin!
Put on your shoes and one step with me down one size. And let’s keep the comfortable clothes out of the public eye!!
There is a space on Facebook called “About Me”. Mine says only “22”. That number doesn’t symbolize my favorite age, nor is it the number of a favorite athlete.
Simply, it defines my goal. In Weight Watchers we talked about realistic goals. Saying we want to lose weight is fine, but for some of us, what we want to lose is beyond the scope of anything immediate. Or even short term. And can even be so overwhelming that it’s hard to stay focused on losing weight at all. Our leader suggested goals that were easy to obtain in the short term to help us build to the long term goal.
Some are focusing on the 10% and some on 5%. For me the number on the scale moving ever so slowly down is a painful reminder of how far is yet to come. And frankly, on someone my size, 10% is barely visible to the naked eye. It’s disheartening when you mention you’re on Weight Watchers and you’re asked if you’ve lost anything yet…after losing 32 pounds. Sigh. I haven’t yet, but did last time I went. Then I got frustrated and quit. I am not going to quit again.
The 22, therefore, does not represent the next weight loss goal. What it does represent is the next size down in my transitional wardrobe. I have many pieces of clothing in 22 and I am, alas, a 24. A large 24. That is not to say I am a 26. The 24s fit. Just fit. So, my goal, the 22, is the size I am shooting for. Loose clothing is something real I can feel and is concrete evidence that, while my husband or kids might not notice I am losing weight, I will know I am losing weight.
I am also trying to forgo ‘comfortable clothes’ in public. You who are bonus sized know what I am talking about: The sweatpants, pajama pants, ‘workout’ pants and stretch pants and the coordinating sweatshirts, oversized blouses and the poly-cotton shirts that stretch (whether we want them to or not).
These clothing choices really do nothing except scream that I am uncomfortable in my own skin so I am not dressing me up when I go out. And you know what? Why shouldn’t I look nice? I mean, I try to pull it together when I go to work, but why shouldn’t I slap on make-up, do my hair and just feel good with who I am when I am not at work?
So, that is why I am focusing on size 22. I can get there – it is one size, one goal, one step. Chinese Philosopher Lao Tzu said the journey of 1,000 miles begins with one step. Let the countdown of many one steps begin!
Put on your shoes and one step with me down one size. And let’s keep the comfortable clothes out of the public eye!!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Sisters
Not too long ago there was an email forward about a mother talking to her recently married daughter. The mother looked at her daughter and advised “Don’t forget your sisters.” And she meant all women. When I got that email – I have to tell you, I knew exactly what she meant. You all should meet just a few of my many “sisters.” These are just a few of my many friends who support me, inspire me and touch me.
First, my real sister, Linda. Bound biologically; we are, for the most part, opposites. I’m young – she’s old (she reads this), I’m more interested in sports, she computers; I’m married, she’s divorced. If we had met randomly at work or at school, we would simply have passed one another by, nodded politely and kept going. I am so glad fate and biology brought us together. She keeps me true to myself and she takes care of me. Like only a sister can.
Next, I’d like you to meet Trish. This is my niece, the aforementioned sister’s daughter. She is actually closer in age to me – eight years difference – than my sister – twelve. She was the first baby I had ever been around and she is actually more like me than anyone I know. We devour books, hold English degrees – mine English Communications, hers English Language Arts with a Masters in English Secondary Education, love our family and are firm believers in the importance of an education. I adore this girl; the little girl she was, the woman she is. I am so proud of her.
You would have to meet Sharon – a friend from college. Sounds trite calling her that - a friend – no formality like best friend, good friend. They are all that to me – that is assumed I guess. Sharon and I share a love of music and laughter. She is the one who I can be the most honest with when I am sad or having a rough go of it and I am that for her. But I tell you this – no one can make me laugh like she does and no one laughs harder at my foibles – planned or unplanned. Like our last Alumni Weekend this past fall. I needed a new bra. Apparently everyone in Adrian in my size did too because while I could find sizes smaller and larger, I couldn’t find my size. Except at Dollar General. Suffice to say, do not buy a bra at that store. Every time I stood up to say hi or hug someone, my bra slid up to my neck. And I do not mean in the back. I sat most of the night politely waving to people I hadn’t seen in years. She of course got a good laugh.
Every once in a while you meet someone that is in that category of someone that is more like a biological sister. That would be Margaret. I met her at college too. She was a year ahead of me and had quite a good influence on me. I matured a bit, calmed down, studied. When I talk to her, after long stretches of not talking to her, it’s as if we had just spoken with one another. We have a nice comfortable friendship - like finding your favorite jeans you’d thought long gone in the back of your closet, you put them on and by golly they still fit.
When I moved up here I made a few friends at work but none like my friend Rose. We met while working at Camelot Music. I don’t think she and I knew what to make of each other. Until the day she was describing her bathroom. It was about time for Hallmark to release the Christmas ornaments and she was awaiting the flamingos. Pink of course. She had decorated her bathroom in everglades I guess and wanted about 5 flamingos to hang from every other ring on her shower curtain (it actually looked pretty cool). She looked at three us of standing there telling us and she was downright giddy. Remembering my recent trip to Kmart I looked at her and said “And to think I was excited when I found a toilet brush to match my curtains!” She laughed and a friendship was born. And we have followed that pattern ever since.
Speaking of work friends, I met Ann at Child and Family Services. After grant funding shut down our division, we met weekly at a local coffee shop to talk about writing, different things Alpena could use (a children’s museum), and life in general. She moved forever ago, back to the UP where she and her husband lived once before. I miss her.
Bonnie is my sister in law. My husband’s sister and not someone I was particularly close too till quite recently. We had always gotten along, but we have both been helping my mother in law. My mother in law is not helpless, but like everyone, she needs a little help, and as she gets older, she needs a little more. Bonnie and I are on the same page most times and have an easy friendship. I am, I must say, one of the lucky few who enjoy all my in-laws.
I have more sisters in life and I could fill a book with them and what they have done for me. It’s important, having other women in your life. They show us things within ourselves we sometimes don’t know we have in us – how to love, how to laugh, how to cry and how to grieve. We need them – they need us. It’s how we get by.
If you don’t have at least one sister, find one. You won’t be sorry.
That email I mentioned before ended with the following and it is too good not to pass along:
Time passes. Life happens.
Distance separates. Children grow up.
Jobs come and go. Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do.
Hearts break. Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors. Careers end.
BUT.........
Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girlfriend is never farther away than needing her can reach.
When you have to walk that lonesome valley by yourself, the women in your life will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end.
Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you...Or come in and carry you out.
Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters, daughters-in- law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers, Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended family, all bless our life!
The world wouldn't be the same without women, and neither would I. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other.
Have a good week – and call someone you haven’t heard from in a while – sometimes it really is like that pair of jeans!
First, my real sister, Linda. Bound biologically; we are, for the most part, opposites. I’m young – she’s old (she reads this), I’m more interested in sports, she computers; I’m married, she’s divorced. If we had met randomly at work or at school, we would simply have passed one another by, nodded politely and kept going. I am so glad fate and biology brought us together. She keeps me true to myself and she takes care of me. Like only a sister can.
Next, I’d like you to meet Trish. This is my niece, the aforementioned sister’s daughter. She is actually closer in age to me – eight years difference – than my sister – twelve. She was the first baby I had ever been around and she is actually more like me than anyone I know. We devour books, hold English degrees – mine English Communications, hers English Language Arts with a Masters in English Secondary Education, love our family and are firm believers in the importance of an education. I adore this girl; the little girl she was, the woman she is. I am so proud of her.
You would have to meet Sharon – a friend from college. Sounds trite calling her that - a friend – no formality like best friend, good friend. They are all that to me – that is assumed I guess. Sharon and I share a love of music and laughter. She is the one who I can be the most honest with when I am sad or having a rough go of it and I am that for her. But I tell you this – no one can make me laugh like she does and no one laughs harder at my foibles – planned or unplanned. Like our last Alumni Weekend this past fall. I needed a new bra. Apparently everyone in Adrian in my size did too because while I could find sizes smaller and larger, I couldn’t find my size. Except at Dollar General. Suffice to say, do not buy a bra at that store. Every time I stood up to say hi or hug someone, my bra slid up to my neck. And I do not mean in the back. I sat most of the night politely waving to people I hadn’t seen in years. She of course got a good laugh.
Every once in a while you meet someone that is in that category of someone that is more like a biological sister. That would be Margaret. I met her at college too. She was a year ahead of me and had quite a good influence on me. I matured a bit, calmed down, studied. When I talk to her, after long stretches of not talking to her, it’s as if we had just spoken with one another. We have a nice comfortable friendship - like finding your favorite jeans you’d thought long gone in the back of your closet, you put them on and by golly they still fit.
When I moved up here I made a few friends at work but none like my friend Rose. We met while working at Camelot Music. I don’t think she and I knew what to make of each other. Until the day she was describing her bathroom. It was about time for Hallmark to release the Christmas ornaments and she was awaiting the flamingos. Pink of course. She had decorated her bathroom in everglades I guess and wanted about 5 flamingos to hang from every other ring on her shower curtain (it actually looked pretty cool). She looked at three us of standing there telling us and she was downright giddy. Remembering my recent trip to Kmart I looked at her and said “And to think I was excited when I found a toilet brush to match my curtains!” She laughed and a friendship was born. And we have followed that pattern ever since.
Speaking of work friends, I met Ann at Child and Family Services. After grant funding shut down our division, we met weekly at a local coffee shop to talk about writing, different things Alpena could use (a children’s museum), and life in general. She moved forever ago, back to the UP where she and her husband lived once before. I miss her.
Bonnie is my sister in law. My husband’s sister and not someone I was particularly close too till quite recently. We had always gotten along, but we have both been helping my mother in law. My mother in law is not helpless, but like everyone, she needs a little help, and as she gets older, she needs a little more. Bonnie and I are on the same page most times and have an easy friendship. I am, I must say, one of the lucky few who enjoy all my in-laws.
I have more sisters in life and I could fill a book with them and what they have done for me. It’s important, having other women in your life. They show us things within ourselves we sometimes don’t know we have in us – how to love, how to laugh, how to cry and how to grieve. We need them – they need us. It’s how we get by.
If you don’t have at least one sister, find one. You won’t be sorry.
That email I mentioned before ended with the following and it is too good not to pass along:
Time passes. Life happens.
Distance separates. Children grow up.
Jobs come and go. Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do.
Hearts break. Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors. Careers end.
BUT.........
Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girlfriend is never farther away than needing her can reach.
When you have to walk that lonesome valley by yourself, the women in your life will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end.
Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you...Or come in and carry you out.
Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters, daughters-in- law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers, Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended family, all bless our life!
The world wouldn't be the same without women, and neither would I. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other.
Have a good week – and call someone you haven’t heard from in a while – sometimes it really is like that pair of jeans!
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