What Am I Really Losing?

In other words, what does the "It" in "Weir Losing It" define for me?
At first I thought it was just weight - you know, "Weir Losing Weight" or "Weir Losing Fat" - however you wish to interpret it - but a few weeks back, I thought "If Dr. Hall read that (Dr. Hall being on of the professors at the college I attended) she would ask what 'it' is."
I guess, for me, that one little two letter word is more than dropping pounds. There is a whole lot going on when someone is losing a substantial amount of weight.
For example, I am starting to lose that part of me that puts everyone first to the neglect of self. That is significant. I do for people. I love to do for people. But at some point along the way - this giving nature of mine as turned into neglecting nature as well.
I'll use socks as an example. If I'm at a store with my spouse and son and mention I need socks, well, my son will need them too. So, you know, I forgo my socks and get the boy socks. Because he really did need them. And he apologizes and says no mom, you get yours when he sees I'm not getting any. But that's OK, because as I said, he needs socks so he gets them...and I don't.
Or I have plans to do something, but someone needs me to do something else so I cancel my plans. Or I shorten them. And you know, I say, Oh that's alright, no problem. And when I think to myself it is a problem, I then feel selfish.
So this weekend, I did for myself. Some might call it selfish, but I still feel good inside. I went to a spa day at Burton's Last Resort - a tavern type establishment right on the lake. And I mean right on. The deck extends a bit over the water so you could hear the waves lapping up underneath you. Well, I had my toes done. I've never had my toes done before. I've never had them polished. So I did. And it was fun. And I was late doing something for someone and I don't think she was too happy when she found out why but you know, I just didn't care because I was doing something that made me feel good. My husband also gave me a bit of a dirty look. Again. Don't care. Doing for me.
Giving to people in and of itself is not a problem; however, it becomes a problem when it is to the degree you are not doing anything for youself. You need to do for yourself. When you are with your friends, with your collegues, with the public in general, you are presenting your whole self, not just that physical shell. When you do things nice for yourself, you are being the best you can be and you in turn give that to the people that surround you. So give them your best.
That's what this column will focus on - what we can lose and what that loss helps us gain!!
What is your "It"? What can you lose to better yourself?

weirlosingit@gmail.com